MANNERS AND ETIQUETTE FOR TODAY'S CONSUMMATE CARNIVORE.

Every writer has been told by the client, "We're turning you loose. Sky's the limit." Which is why it's always all the more existentially crushing when you shoot for the stars, fall past the moon and land back on Earth so hard you create a sinkhole straight to hell.

 

This was not that time. Longhorn Steakhouse needed a holdover Facebook campaign to maintain a presence for a few months while their new, all-singing, all-dancing campaign was held up in production. I could sense equal parts desperation and frustration in their voices and said those four dreaded words... "I've got an idea."

 

We created a Facebook microsite called "Meatiquette" - an online guide for red meat's loyal denizens to brush up on how to order, what to order, how to eat it and how to pay for it. Frankly, I haven't had this much fun writing a 40+ page microsite in my entire career and, if I never do again, I'll still smile fondly on the long night I spent whipping together this self-aware, self-effacing and perfectly-seasoned slice of carnivore humor.

 

More than once during the presentation, the clients laughed. Out loud. And changed a grand total of three words.